A Bar of Jeer

The other night J and I went to a place called the Tin Roof where he was playing guitar for a friend's writer's round. I, as usual, was just a tag-a-long...a mere mortal in a sea of mythical...okay okay I'm being dramatic. Basically I was the only one not in the music business. Again. So when everyone asks what brought me to Nashville, am I a singer? Songwriter? Manager?? Anything??! No. I came here for my boyfriend. I can do nothing for you except maybe make you laugh. If you have even the slightest bit of personality and sense of humor. Oh, you don't?? Okay cool. In that case you have nothing to offer me either. ZING!! So after I played that whole scenario out in my mind (mostly after this girl came up to us and introduced herself like this: "Haaa. I'm Kelly Paaaige." ...the 'haaa' is supposed to be a 'hi' in an I'm-trying-to-be-a-southern-belle voice. And yeah. Everyone introduces themselves with their first and last names. Mmm hmm. YOU'RE NOT FAMOUS. Although I do remember her name. Crap.) anyway...after that, I decided I was having fun. Especially since this place serves their beer in jars. Yes, jars. For the low low price of $2, you get your tasty draft beer in a nice glass jar that I decided from the get-go I was going to steal. J was making fun of me, calling me a klepto, as I have been known to "acquire" random things from the bar. Like a stack of sweet shot glasses that were LEFT ON THE BAR. So while he was up on stage, and I was sitting by myself, I spent at least 10 minutes trying to swiftly stash the jar in my purse. Right after I did it, while I was still basking in the glow of my success, I learned that you're supposed to take them home. In fact, written on the side of the jar is the phrase; "Stolen from the Tin Roof."

J and I left that night with 5 jeer bars.


Today after work, J decided since it was so nice out it was a good day to sweep all the dead leaves off the driveway. I decided I would go outside and try to help. After I moved the garbage cans and my car, my part was done, as we only had one broom. But alas, I caught the itch. I wanted to do everything. I wanted to mow the grass and pick the weeds from the flower beds and plant more flowers and go buy a bird bath and build a koi pond and..yeah you get the idea. I decided picking the weeds was a good place to start. After an hour, I realized there are more weeds in our yard and flower bed than there are in the entire world. It looks a hell of a lot better than it did, but I had to force myself to stop or I would have gone on for days. Clearly I've bitten off more than I can chew, and I absolutely have to finish now that I've started. Bahhh I guess I know what I'm doing every night after work for the next 7 weeks. I'm so domestic.